Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
