Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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