he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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