I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I will be naked everywhere
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
