Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
do herpes really smell.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
