This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
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