I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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