Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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