You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
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