wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
