She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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