I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Randomize
