this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
