Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
