and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
