Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
