so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
