I wish you could order shots online.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize