if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
