when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize