Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(757): View more from Virginia

My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.

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(757): My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed. http://tfl.nu/rjig

Replies (28) Good night (647) Bad night (5085)
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(419): View more from Ohio

How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?

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(419): How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles? http://tfl.nu/1dpq

Replies (12) Good night (1481) Bad night (4306)
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(408): View more from California

you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face

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(408): you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face http://tfl.nu/f86d

Replies (46) Good night (10768) Bad night (2774)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.

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(610): all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville. http://tfl.nu/k1x4

Replies (6) Good night (8139) Bad night (1613)
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(317): View more from Indiana

The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.

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(317): The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints. http://tfl.nu/xoq4

Replies (6) Good night (920) Bad night (4730)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back

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(+44): Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back http://tfl.nu/tdhe

Replies (12) Good night (904) Bad night (4555)
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(804): View more from Virginia

.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you

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(804): .....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you http://tfl.nu/s188

Replies (3) Good night (3335) Bad night (718)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.

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(973): Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality. http://tfl.nu/dmqi

Replies (9) Good night (2055) Bad night (966)
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(314): View more from Missouri

The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight

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(314): The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight http://tfl.nu/sdqv

Replies (7) Good night (4106) Bad night (783)
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(503): View more from Oregon

Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.

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(503): Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination. http://tfl.nu/nd2x

Replies (7) Good night (1537) Bad night (487)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.

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(202): Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/pg5d

Replies (2) Good night (1439) Bad night (371)
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(513): View more from Ohio

Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.

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(513): Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now. http://tfl.nu/fv9l

Replies (5) Good night (922) Bad night (494)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.

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(+44): I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze. http://tfl.nu/d2nt

Replies (5) Good night (1201) Bad night (385)
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(218): View more from Minnesota

I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.

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(218): I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over. http://tfl.nu/5car

Replies (4) Good night (1499) Bad night (310)
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(805): View more from California

YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.

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(805): YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE. http://tfl.nu/6feq

Replies (5) Good night (576) Bad night (210)

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