I wish I only lived at night.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died