Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
