You work out of a Hotel?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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