I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
