It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
