Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
