i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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