the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize