1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
