Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
