office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
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