I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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