it was like his penis was on wheels.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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