haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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