All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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