Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
