We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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