hell yes lets make some ravioli
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
