Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize