i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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