I puked a lego.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize