Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
