Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
4 words: hood of his car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
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