I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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