what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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