I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
