Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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