im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I understand Curling. That high.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
