Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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