that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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