wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
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